7 Tips To Help You Talk To Your Children About A Senseless Tragedy

By Shari Botwin, LCSW

Less than twenty four hours ago the world learned about another senseless killing in a place of worship, The Tree Of Life Synagogue. Seconds after the news broke millions of people took to social media expressing their shock, fear and grief. I found myself thinking, “How do we explain this latest tragedy to our kids? How do we explain an event filled with so much hatred? How do we create safety when our own feelings about vulnerability are activated?” I have been counseling survivors of trauma in my private practice for over 20 years. I have met men and women who lost family members or partners to suicide, gun violence, terrorism and plane crashes. All of these patients were kids or teenagers when the event occurred. One of the worst parts of the trauma is not having a place or people to work through their feelings of grief and fear. Many of my patients come to therapy after these events because they are left with years of undigested feelings, which resulted in developing severe depression, anxiety and other mental illnesses.

First thing this morning I went through my social media newsfeed and was struck by my friend’s post, Rabbi Yitzi Weiner, “My sweet young daughter asked me before going to bed tonight, ‘Abba are Nazis going to kill us too?” My heart sank and I…